Wednesday, July 13, 2011

What's next ladies?

Here I am sitting on my bed, my nokia c6 in hand and typing away... Different things going on in my mind. It doesn't help that I don't have a job and that I am female.
What has that last part got to do with anything? I'll tell you: in my country Naija (Nigeria), when a girl finishes service the next thing all is expecting is marraige! It doesn't matter that you finished at 22 or 30, it's the same yardstick of measurement for every girl!
During service year, when I was busy trying to develop myself mentally and spiritually, most girls were trying to develop 'marriagically'. The deal being they must finish the service year with two things: a National Youth Service Corps certificate and an engagement ring! You'll be surprised what these girls are ready to do to have a man propose to them but that's not my topic for today.
Dear fellow unmarried ladies, It doesn't have to be this way. Are you kidding me? What is going on? Instead of making women love themselves with dignity and integrity, this is making them desperate! We were created because God saw that man was alone and it was not good, to be a helper and a companion. When Adam first saw Eve he exclaimed, "Atlast!...". I can just imagine how lonely he must have been seeing that animals were made in pairs and him just one...
Take a deep breath! We're not in this life to compete and compare livestyle with oneanother. We are here to worship God and live in the fullness of life's joy and happiness. Instead of worrying yourself(that only shows your desperation, gives wrinkles and produces nothing), why don't you focus on other things like self development, a career...
But I am getting older, if I don't get married now I may never do, I want to have kids now...and all the 1001 other things to do! Jeez girl, you can plan life but the eventuality is beyond your powers honestly. Dream big, want things, desire change but can you also try to be patient and cast your whole fears and burdens on God?
I am 24, unmarried and without a job but I can honestly tell you I will eventually have a job, 3kids and a loving husband and I say this with the authority of the most high I believe in! I would rather wait than wake up every morning with a swollen eye, in frustration, beside a man I stopped loving long ago because I rushed into marriage out of desperation and without God!
I just had a long talk with my mom and she told me some things I'll love to share with you all like me.
* Don't be, act or ever show you're desperate, it puts the nice guys off and attract the losers.
* Keep yourself with dignity but don't be proud!
* Be sociable, you still need friends around you.
*Be prepared for advances from all sorts of guys who think you're desperate and will therefore settle for anything.
*You don't owe it to anyone to tell you how they think your life should be. They are not God.
*Focus your love and efforts on God and your career. If you don't have a career, get busy!
*It's not a must you have to get married dear, you can be a spinster and no you don't have to be a reverend sister.
*Eventually when all these get by and you're married with kids, no one keeps a record that you got married early or not. All that will matter then is how happily married you are.
I hope I've been able to give rest to some ladies who have cried their eyes out because suitors are not coming. It may have to do with how you lived your live in the past, it may not. Whatever it is, use this waiting period to work on it okay?
God loves you and all his gifts are good and perfect!
A beautiful day to you. Thelish!

1 comment:

  1. good one bunky...you are right on point!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

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